Help!

"It is more blessed to give than to receive."
"My help is in the name of the Lord who made the heavens and the earth."


I am not gifted in asking for help.  I find this to be a fault in me. That may sound strange; I'm not needy so there's something wrong with me?  Let me explain.


I love to give of my time, my talents, my opinions, my energies to others.  I am energized when I can comfort or encourage someone in conversation, in writing, in deed.  And I feel very blessed when someone encourages me in the same way.  But to ask someone to do something for me that will involve any kind of sacrifice of time or energy on their part is a request I avoid like I would avoid a stray dog in my path.  I have a healthy fear of the stray dog; I have an unhealthy fear of rejection or the feeling of neediness or obligation that asking for help brings.  I'm sure that some of it is pride; I don't want to be thought of as 'needy' or incapable of doing something myself.


It is difficult to need; it is much easier to figure out a way to get by on my own.  But that is not how God  planned for His people to relate to each other.  He calls us His body (The eye cannot say to the hand, “I have no need of you,” nor again the head to the feet, “I have no need of you.”); and although one could survive with one arm, or one kidney, or one eye, ear, hand, it is not ideal.  In fact, if we know someone who is handicapped in these ways, we naturally assume that they struggle with some aspects of living that we take for granted.  So I need not 'go it alone' ; I can and should ask for help and accept it, even rejoice in it.


When I need help from someone, I am meeting the design requirements of my Maker.  And when I give help, I am also fulfilling His desire for the Body.   I believe the Lord places me at times in situations where I must ask for help.  Help packing, help cleaning, help homeschooling, help even in giving to others: all these are ways that I can ask and receive physical help that serves me personally.  When help is given, I must thank God for the help, thank the person for her time and energies spent on me, and remember that I am not only  blessed when giving but also when receiving.

Blessings

Count your blessings,

Name them one by one,

Count your every blessing,

See what God has done!

When I was young we had a children's recording with a song that had these words. The chorus has echoed in my head this week over and over again. It made me think of a verse that talks about counting, only in a different context: Count it all joy, my brothers, when you face trials of all kinds, knowing that the testing of your faith produces patience. And let patience have it's perfect work, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking nothing. (James 1:2-3) I had the privilege this week of counting blessings and letting patience do it's perfect work in me and I wanted to share some of what I've learned from it.

You may be asking: what does counting your blessings have to do with trials or patience? I have discovered that they are closely related. Let me explain by experience. This week began with counting blessings when our family looked at a house we were considering buying. It is a house that would meet desires for space, for privacy, for exercising hospitality, for enjoyment of man-made, God-given things, like hardwood floors, spacious kitchens, large decks, and more. There was excitement that we could actually live in this house and enjoy these things. Woven into the excitement was the knowledge that a desire we have could be a desire that God also has for us. In other words, I was blessed in knowing that God may be saying 'yes' to a desire that our family had to put aside for awhile as we were trained in a different area of our faith (but I'll leave that for another post).

My mind ran through the many ways God has blessed us as we learn to depend on Him to meet true needs. We've experienced blessing through trial and blessing through waiting on the Lord, blessing through answered prayer even when the answer has been 'no,' or 'wait.' Now it seemed as if the answer could be 'yes'.

The next verse in James is: "If any of you lacks wisdom, let him as of God, who gives generously to all without reproach, and it will be given him. But let him ask in faith, without doubting, for he who doubts is like a wave of the sea, driven and tossed by the wind. Let not that man suppose he will receive anything from the Lord; he is a double-minded man, unstable in all his ways."

This verse brings me to the facing of trials and producing patience. The last two days have been a time of prayer and wondering if our offer on the 'dream' house would be accepted. The verses in James have been recalled many times as I prayed for joy, for patience, for wisdom, and for faith.

The Lord is good and gracious; and I would still be saying that if we didn't get the house! I spent long parts of the day yesterday in prayer, asking God to change my heart if His answer was no to the house, to be ready to give it up if the deal didn't go through. To be ready to trust in Him to find us a different place or to direct us in some other way if this wasn't to be. Towards the end, I didn't think the sellers were going to sell it to us; and that was going to be ok.

But all the while that I was praying, I was trusting and believing that it might happen; we were working all day de-cluttering and packing bedroom closets AS IF we were going to move. I did not want to exercise doubt; I wanted to exercise faith. I had to make a conscious effort to exercise my faith, believing that until I knew otherwise, I would proceed as if God were saying, 'yes' to us about buying the house. Several times I thought, "Will this all be for nothing? will we be waiting and searching for months or maybe never move?"

But when those thoughts entered my mind, I asked God to remove them; I couldn't go down that path of thinking or I would have wallowed in the mud there.

My walk with the Lord was more like crawling on my knees, trying to stand up and face whichever path He wanted for me. After knowing that our offer was accepted, I wondered if I would have stood as tall with a smile inside (joy) if the answer had been 'no'. I know that the Lord would have worked the smile (joy) into me over time. A blessing of a spiritual kind, not material.

I continue to pray that my desires will be only what the Lord desires for me, that if He meets desires or wants, He will use them for His glory and my good. I know He showers me with blessings, blessings of trial to grow my faith, and spiritual and material blessings that can be used for His kingdom work. I want to count it all joy in any circumstance that the Lord places me.

Are you counting your blessings? Can you name them one by one? Do you count it joy to face trials and have patience worked in you? Do you ask for wisdom, trusting in God to work His will for you in the best way, but in His way, not yours? These are the questions I've pondered this week. I'm thankful that the Lord has walked me through them.

On Second Thought

I like change. You can ask my husband for proof if you don't believe me. He watches me try on several outfits on Sunday mornings before deciding what I want to wear for church. I move cabinet contents around in the kitchen when I think they should be stored in a different location (my family hates that--and I have to admit--it is hard to find things for awhile until we're used to the new place). I change the furniture around in the family room periodically for a different look. I can't decide what to make for supper, and sometimes must shift gears from one main entree to another because I don't have the ingredients on hand that are needed.

Change involves choice. I make choices every day: wavy hair or straight, coffee or tea, bath or shower, exercise or nap, call or write, read or watch tv, knit or crochet, and more. I prefer to think of the prerogative of change as making the best choice for the time, being flexible, and not getting into a rut. It seems to me that there may be a better way to do something or at least a different way and I want to explore the choices I have.

Change can be positive and healthy, keeping a person moving forward, growing. If you never change your exercise regimen, for example, your body will adjust to the level that you are exerting yourself, and you won't see any physical changes from your exertions. Or worse, you may lose interest in exercise because it becomes boring and monotonous.

Change should be avoided if it's done only for the sake of change. There should be discernment even when deciding what to wear or whether it's time for a different hairstyle. I have to think about the consequences of change. If I drink coffee instead of tea will the caffeine be too much at that time of day? Can I afford a haircut this week? Do I have time to talk on the phone? If I don't exercise, will I regret it? Do I need a nap more than a workout today? These and many more questions are posed as I consider what to do.

Humans are creatures of habit so change doesn't always come easily to us. That may be good. Habits are formed so that we don't have to ask ourselves the same questions over and over; we know we're going to get up, shower, dress, brush our teeth, eat breakfast, etc without having to consider our options every step of the way. But sometimes habits need to be broken. Or a routine needs to be adjusted to accommodate another person or activity. Those are changes, too. I have to be willing to make a change so I can be flexible enough to live with others and serve others.

I also change as knowledge and experience shows me that what I believe about something isn't how it really is. I hope that I am open-minded enough to learn, and with learning, to change how I see myself and others in relation to God and His creation and the working out of His will. Because I am a new creation, I will change as I grow in my faith. My mind will be renewed to know God's desires for me. Experience is an impetus of change, bringing forth maturity that changes a person's perspective.

I am changing as God changes me. I pray that most of the changes in me are for the better.
The promise I have from God's word is that He will never change. He is the same, yesterday, today, and forever.