Moms Don't Take Vacations

When a mom goes away and leaves children home, a part of her hopes that said children will keep things neat and tidy, clean up after themselves, and generally run the house the way she does. That part of mom--we'll call her 'manager mom', wants to come home to a clean house so she can pick up her duties without a back log of work.
But another side of moms is the sub-conscious, quiet side of mothers who miss their children, miss their home, miss cooking for the family, miss being in charge of who goes where when and how.  That part of mothers--we'll call her 'sentimental mom' knows--feels--instinctively--that not every thing will be done according to manager mom's plans--and secretly relishes that fact.  She knows that no one child (or even serveral) can do the work of manager mom and she's glad, even if she does not care to admit it to her family.
When sentimental mom gets home and sees piles of dirty clothes waiting to be washed, she knows it means her laundering duties are vital to the family.  When she sees leftover food in the fridge from the day before she left for a 6-day absence, she realizes that her daily reminders are necessary for smooth household routines.
Manager mom is glad and even proud of how well her children managed without her.  She hears reports from others about how responsible they are, what a delight they were to those who helped care for them while mom and dad were gone.  She know they can manage on their own, that they are responsible for themselves, each other, the dog and the house and she feels blessed by their maturity.
Sentimental mom hears the tired tones in the nightly calls to home, though.  She understands the weary, exasperated spirit behind the complaint, "I'm ready to kill our dog, mom. She's been barking every night and early every morning!"
Being the keeper of the house and schedule is hard work.  Sentimental/Manager mom knows it.  She gets tired and weary, exasperated and ready to quit sometimes, too.  Both Sentimental and Manager mom are glad to be home, back on the job (no matter how back-logged it is), ready to get to work caring for her family in person again.

God's will worked out

God takes us right where we are and moves us along to where He wants us.  It doesn't matter to Him (it seems to hinder us, but not Him) that we are bogged down in a particular sinful tendency--pride, selfishness, anger bitterness, fear, etc.  He carries us along step by step down the path He has for us.  And as He does this, He teaches us through blessed circumstances or dire consequences what He would have us to learn.  He conforms us to His image. 
This week I witnessed this training-image conforming firsthand.  I watched the transforming power of the Holy Sipirit at work on one of God's own.  
I know I'm supposed to be sad that my son has gone to college. I'm not saying I'm not --sad that is--but I'm also rejoicing over it.  No, it's not because he is my HMO (high maintenance offspring) and I'm glad to get rid of him--far from it.  I'm already wondering how I'm going to sleep tonight without hearing the familiar 'thump, thump,' of his stereo overhead.
I rejoice because I witnessed God's hand and His plan this week guiding and directing, comforting, encouraging, and blessing both Justin and his parents.
On our trip up north to college, there were anxieties fueled by the unknown: unknown roommate, unknown college, unknown church, unknown professors.  As information unfolded through daily events the unknown took the form of blessing.  There was confimation of the decision to go to this particular college and study a particular major.  Over and over again God confirmed what had been planned and prayed over for months.
Answer to prayers were positive and profound: a roommate who seems a well-suited personality, a school that recognizes what freshmen face, a church community that includes professors who teach in Justin's field of expertise.  The Lord showed us this week that He cares about all the details and deals with our anxieties by revealing His plan as we need it. In our weakness He is strong to lead and guide.  Whether we succeed or fail, are blessed or disciplined or tried (which may also bring blessing), we know that God's plan is worked through us to accomplish His will for us.
That is why I am happy about Justin going away.  How sad can I be when I know that God has him exactly where He should be?
I know God is working in Justin His good will for him.  I know that when I am anxious or sad, He will remind me of His purposes for Justin.  He calls me to pray for Justin and I will (and have) as he faces new challenges that will mature and strengthen his faith.
This is a new beginning for Justin and an exciting (if somewhat scary) time of adjustment for all of us.  I don't want to look back but forward as I am excited to see how the Lord uses these new experiences to grow His child in His image.

Communication

Here is an actual email received by a mother from her son:

 Subject: Laundry . . .

Would you do some of mine today? Thanks.

Makes you wonder why parents think their teenagers don't communicate with them!

Whew!

God is merciful to you, you miserable sinner!
These are the words I laughingly expressed to my son when we discovered that he does not need 4 years of math to be qualified for college admission.  We have been struggling with Trigonometry all year.  Last night I told him that I could give him half a credit but not a full credit because we haven't done enough lessons.  Today we know that 3.5 credits is enough. 
To say that he was overjoyed, elated, thrilled, and giddy with relief is an understatement.  To say that I was, too, goes without saying.
His next question to me:  "Why didn't we know this before?" 
I told him that God must have been teaching him something that had nothing to do with Trigonometry.  Did he learn the lesson?  He is learning it as am I.  We've been taught it as we've schooled together for 10 years.  He must listen to me because I am his teacher; I must hear him because he is my son.

Many are called, few are chosen

I was summoned to serve for jury duty this week.  I went in this morning and was already home by lunch.
This week is pretty busy for us as we try to get school finished and prepare for Justin's graduation next week.So I was worried that my time would be eaten up with serving jury duty for the whole week.  All I can say is: I'm glad to live in Lancaster County, SC.
The jury panel gathered in the courtroom (which is just a big meeting room) around 9 a.m.   It seemed to take a while to get started, but that gave people a chance to converse among themselves.  We were told there would be three trials this week, all traffic-related.  Then the process began for sifting out those who couldn't serve or had excuses.  After the initial weeding, the individual cases were announced and the process continued as the state and the defendants passed or excused jurors.  Each case needed 6 jurors, many of whom were selected to serve for more than one trial.  The process was very interesting to me and I'm glad I was a part of it.
Unfortunately, I was excused as a juror for the third trial.  I was presented as a juror by the state lawyers, but excused by the defendant.  This was because it was a drunk driving case and I had to say that a member of my family had been involved in a car accident with a drunk driver.  Even though it was years ago, and I said that I believed I could still be fair and impartial during the trial, I was excused. 

I just want to share some observations about this experience: 

• SC takes jury duty seriously; the judge reiterated what I read on the SC judicial website about how important it is in free society to exercise our liberties through a fair and impartial court system. Serving as a juror is a major contribution to the preservation of our freedoms.
• Some people do not want to serve as jurors.  Even the retired people were asked to please consider serving, but still 4 of them asked to be excused (you can be excused for being over 65).
• One of the important questions asked is if everyone is a registered voter.  Voting was listed by the judge as number 2 of the 3 ways you can serve your country (#1-defense/military, #3 jury duty).
• There were many people who didn't show up; their names were called during roll call but they were absent.  I don't understand why someone would put himself in contempt by not coming when called.
• The atmosphere at this government building is very different from the atmosphere at the DMV.  People were friendly and talked to each other while waiting.  It was almost like we were on the same team.  In fact, in my row, two women were encouraged to tell the judge why they should be excused by the people they sat beside who knew their situation.  In the courtroom, we were thanked several times for doing our duty as jurors. The judge wanted us to know that it's nothing personal if we are excused from a trial.  At the DMV, every one gets a number, and then it's every man for himself.  You hope you have every form they ask you for and know that you can be rejected at a moment's notice. 

 The small town atmosphere made the experience enjoyable rather than stressful. Some of the jury panel even knew the people involved in the cases and had to be excused.  The lawyers were friendly to each other and to the judge.  It was overall a positive experience to see our justice system at work on the local level.  I'm glad I was a part of the process and I'm glad it's over.

Every Other Day in the Month of May?

My daughter and son are trying to post something to their blogs 'Every day except Sunday for the month of  May'.  So I thought I would join them.
The problem:  it's already May 4 and I haven't posted!
The solution: I've tweaked the mantra to suit my own procrastinator nature (although, as you can see, I'm still not on track).
My goal is to be forced into a habit of writing that hopefully will continue past May.
My posts will be more like journal entries, but that's ok, I guess. I'm sure they will be works in progress.  Even short posts seem to take me a while to write.  Maybe I'll review the day's highlights/lowlights and comment. Maybe I'll just write to say I wrote.  This should be an interesting experience for me as a blogger.  I'll actually have to 'blog'.

New Beginnings

  Although this week I've fought a cold and loss of energy, I feel like I am starting over again with many areas of my life. We've finished one commitment for school and it is very freeing; it gives me time at home that I haven't had for months.  I am so happy to be home again.  I can't say how much I missed being home during the day, in the evenings, on Saturdays.  I missed planning out our school days, reading and discussing our books, cooking dinner for my family, sitting quietly in the evenings with a hobby, book, or movie.
  So I begin our home routines again.  I look forward to being home on Saturdays, even if it means I'm cleaning the house.  I've used this week as a catch up on sleep and recuperating from a cold, but I know that I have the rest of the month to get back to normal.  I'm excited about normal days of home life.  I missed them.